These Are My Confessions...

"Just when I thought I said all I could say..."

(if you aren't singing that right now then clearly you are too young to be reading my blog. Gotta love some throwback Usher!)

 

I just feel the need to get some recent confessions off my chest. I miss the Confessions link ups (they are probably still around...I'm just out of the bloggy loop).

 

I confess...

 

It annoys me that there are always haters in life.

 

I haven't been drinking hardly any wine at all lately, who am I? Summer brings out my inner beer lover.

 

Humidity is the devil. You'd think living in the South my whole life I'd be used it to... but you never get used to frizzy hair and sticky sweat.

You know Lebron is my boo... but I really can't be mad about the Warriors winning it all last night. If you don't have love for Steph Curry then you ain't living right because that boy is incredible. This whole playoff series was so fun to watch them battle back and forth.

 

And now that basketball is over...
80 days until College Football is back! Can I get an AMEN??

This guy has truly stolen my heart, y'all. He's just everything that is precious and I pretty much spend all my time with him these days. I'm completely that annoying girl who is newly in love. I apologize for blowing up your Instagram, Twitter & Facebook feeds with my heart eyed emojis for him. #sorrynotsorry

PS - NO I'm not naked :)

I have an obsession with neon bathing suit pieces. (Just a quick poll - does anybody even wear matchy bikini sets anymore? I am all about that mix & match life.)

Speaking of obsessions... The Weeknd and Meek Mill are high on my list right now. And little miss Kelsea Ballerini and her "Love Me Like You Mean It" jam. FYI - she's from Knoxville!

Again with neons & obsessions, I got a new pair of running shoes. You know, because all that running I've been doing??? (jokes) I'm a slacker and I've only used them once, but I love them. this is the 2nd pair of neon yellow and pink Asics I've had so I guess you could say I'm a big fan.

I'm finally reading The Andy Cohen Diaries. I love that man and all his Bravo magic - especially those crazy housewives. Can he be my spirit animal? The book is really good, so far.
 

Y'all heard of Firmoo yet? If not then you need to hop on over there and check out their selection of glasses! This is the 2nd pair that I've gotten from them to review, and I doubt I'll ever get glasses anywhere else again. They are GREAT - easy to deal with, easy to order, great follow up to make sure you're happy with the glasses. Plus, they have a ton of new styles, frames and colors to choose from. A girl needs choices in her life! Plus - as a new customer you can get 15% off instantly just for trying them out.

 

Thursday Thoughts

First off, thank you all from the bottom of my little heart for all your sweet comments on my last post about my mama. Yes, this time has been difficult but it's also been such a blessing to see the incredible community of people the Lord has placed in my path for this specific time and healing. Truly, I am in awe of the kindness that I have been offered. I'm telling you God is good ALL THE TIME!

 

I wore pants yesterday that I hadn't worn in almost 2 years. Talk about a non scale victory! I have been working my booty off and the progress is so encouraging!

 

Finally bought the Andy Cohen Diaries to read. I actually have a "to read" stack that's HUGE right now. I need to turn off the TV and get to page turning.

 

But Scandal though...  Also, I'm back watching Mad Men because I have to see what happens. And RHONY is back sooooo maybe eventually I'll get around to reading all my books.

 

Loved this read from Renee Fisher. This is a must read for anyone who missed the IF:Gathering this year and feels lost or stuck in the season of life you are in.

I'm going to make this pretty thing with my work girls next Friday night and I am stoked!

Happy Pre-Friday!

Thursday Thoughts

Thursday is the 2nd best day of the work week. The end is near. (That sounded very The Walking Dead-sih) I mean the end of the week is in sight, weekend is right around the corner, better days are a'comin'! No better time than a Thursday to link up with Meagan.

 

- speaking of The Walking Dead... I am reeeeeally digging this Alexandria story line. I can't believe only two more episodes until the finale already!
Also, any of my real housewives girls dying over the RHONY premier coming up with Bethenny being back?

never gets old!

- spring sunrises (pretend it's not blurry) God is THE best artist!

- I joined a new gym and have been steadily trying to get working out back into my regular schedule. so far so good. summer body here I come!

- baseball season is coming

- my love affair with avocados has officially gone to the next level

- my friend Amy's honest post about Love without Sex. If she didn't live all the way across the country I would be sitting on her couch tonight talking (probably crying) about this one face to face.

- cute dog accounts on instagram & twitter are my newest guilty pleasure

- made for more messages

Motivational Monday

It's Monday...

 

And after a week like last week, (which most people got to spend lounging at home, but I still had to make my way into work) I need a little motivation. PS - can you believe I'm blogging for the THIRD time with in a week??

 

Spreading the love today! Happy Monday my loves!

 

1. Treat yo self

I'm a huge Parks & Rec fan! I have adopted the treat yo self motto practically as my own. When you're single I feel that it really is necessary to treat yo self every now and then. You deserve it! That's what I told myself when I spend a crap ton of money last week during the snow/ice storm shopping online. A little treat yo self goes a looooong way in my book. Can be as simple as a Starbucks run, whatever your little heart desires. Indulge on a Monday!

source

2. After you treat yo self - treat someone else

After my Lent post last week, plenty of you little sweethearts reached out to encourage me. (I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!) It's so incredibly uplifting to be reminded of your magic when you forget. For someone from the outside looking in - heck, sometimes someone who has never even met you - to remind you that you're pretty awesome. Remember a time when someone reminded you of your magic - channel that today and lift someone up.

Source

Little Giveaway!! 

 Leave a comment and tell me someone you'd like to encourage this week & why. I have a $15 giftcard to Target I'm willing to give away to a random lucky winner just to brighten their day!

3. All aboard the healthy train - choooo chooooo

I have been eating like a horse. Also, I've been lazy. Lazy like a (insert animal that is incredibly lazy). We are about 3-ish months away from summer. Me continuing to eat like a horse will NOT make me a happy camper once lake season is here. I want to be proud of my body this summer! Even in a bathing suit. Back to the gym I go. I'm officially announcing here that I am training for a 5k in April. For the first time in like 2 years. Pray for me y'all - I MIGHT DIE! I probably can't even run a single mile right now. It's been many moons and many pounds ago that I even tried. I want to attract a boyfriend in the future who is into fitness too. It helps so much to have someone who can workout with you and encourage you.

 

My girls Cassie & Lindsay have been a huge inspiration to me with their fitness journeys so - y'all better keep me in line. Overall I'd like to drop 30 lbs from where I'm at right now. I know it won't be done overnight so please reach out to me and encourage me!

 

 

4. I am the nerdiest of nerds - and I'm so okay with it

When I was younger, I was a little embarrassed by how nerdy I was. A lot of my friends weren't into school like I was. Much less dinosaurs, history, science, reading and all the awesome things that I loved to learn about. I tried to hide it. I actually pulled a little Lindsay Lohan from Mean Girls and tried to act dumb a time or two. Then I had a teacher in high school who really taught me how much better it is to embrace your inner nerd. Being intelligent is attractive. And awesome. We all like weird things. My obsession with US presidents & the civil war isn't weird - it's just MY thing. Well, one of my things. (I feel like I have more "things" than most)

 

LONG winded story short - I have decided I am going to reward myself with this mug. After I lose 15 lbs (half my goal), that is. It's a nerdy gift and I LOVE IT! Back on the healthy wagon, plus a sweet reward for a prize.

Source

How's that for a Monday???

Life Catch Up

WOW I cannot believe it's been 28 days since my last post!! Am I even allowed to technically call myself a blogger anymore? Yeah...probably not. I have missed reading your stories and telling you mine SO MUCH, but honestly life has been happening! And I ain't mad about that!

 

So here's a little catch up for your reading pleasure ~

 

I know the big thing everybody wants to know about is this boy I've been vaguely tweeting about! Kinda funny that in my last Thursday Things To Love post I mentioned that I was taking a dating break. And I really had every intention in my heart to do that! But the boy I said had asked me out and I turned him down in that post? Well he asked me out a couple more times and after turning him down again, I recognized his persistence and agreed to go out with him. Well that was a month ago and we have been together almost everyday since then. I affectionately refer to him as my "almost boyfriend". I forgot how much fun it is to feel this excited! This is the by far the biggest risk I've taken in a year and a half, and honestly even though it's a little scary - it's mostly just filling my heart up. I already have my hopes up, don't get me wrong, but I really want God to be in control of this situation. I don't want to rush it or try to control it. I just want to enjoy it for the blessing that it's been. Maybe more to come on him later...

More good news is that I'm going on a mission trip to the Dominican Republic at the end of July. I cannot tell you how genuinely excited I am!!! I'm still not 100% how I am going to make all the money pieces come together, but I know they will. I feel so led to go and even if I can't spend a penny until then, I will make it work. Will you just pray for me? Will you pray that all the funding comes together and that our group stays focused on our mission and keeps our eyes on God during this awesome time? Thank you friends! I  would appreciate it so much!

Speaking of praying, please keep my mama in your prayers too. (I know I'm asking a lot of you guys today!) I can't remember if I shared the news here or not, but we found out at the end of April that not only is she still battling the stage 4 lung cancer after over a year - but now she's also been diagnosed with stage 2 leukemia. Some days are better than others, but she is really sick. I'm thankful that our relationship has improved so much during this sad time, but we still have rocky times. We really won't know more until later in June when she has another scan. The Lord is faithful, and I know He will take care of her during this time. That doesn't mean that her body will necessarily be healed of this awful cancer, but hopefully all the praying we are doing will comfort her and let her know she's not fighting alone.

Summertime is here finally! For me that means still striving to get my lake body back in shape after lots of neglect. I've made some good progress, and bought some new jeans but I still have a ways to go. I'm doing this challenge for June. My workouts have been so sporadic that I figure this is better than no workouts at all.

 

I think pretty much everything else is status quo around here. Things continue to happen at a rapid pace (feels like), but I think I'm just handling them better. Deep breaths!

I'm going to leave you with one of my favorite YouTube videos right now. You're welcome! :) Glad we got to take a few minutes to catch up. I won't be a such a stranger anymore, hopefully! XOXO
 

 

 

5 on a Friday

{ONE}

Last weekend I read The Silent Wife. If you like a psychological type of thriller (very Gone Girl style) then I highly recommend this one to you! I love a book that keeps me guessing! (and if you're wondering why the book looks to beat up, it's because it's a library book. Yes, I still check out library books because I am a nerd).

 

{TWO}

Last Friday night at WinterJam, I got introduced to some new bands. They are Christian bands, but their music sounds very secular - just with a positive message. You know I like boy bands - HELLO HARRY STYLES - and now I've found a new one to love! Tenth Avenue North. I can't stop listening to them.

 

 

{THREE}

I posted this on my Instagram {@nikkib918} last night so you know what that means? Back on the weight loss wagon! For real this time. All excuses aside. I'll be back in the land of the skinny in no time. Prepare yourselves for workout posts...because I'm sure they will be following this outburst.

 

{FOUR}

Can I get an amen?

 

{FIVE}

And speaking of Hebrews....

BEST TRANSITION EVER!!

Amy posted this verse last night and it really got me thinking. And when I get to thinking, you are the poor souls who reap the rewards :) In order to grow- not just in our relationships with God but in general, we must be disciplined. In order for me to stick to losing this weight, I will have to be overly disciplined with my choices. Same goes for growing my relationship with God, I must choose to spend time with him and in His word. It's a sort of training program that helps me share in his holiness.

Hebrews 12:10-11

¹⁰ They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. ¹¹ No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

 

Happy weekend my loves! It's going to be sunny and 65 here so I am going to embark on my first outside run in MONTHS - hopefully I don't die. XOXO

 

Weekend Update

This is gonna be short & to the point...
WHY IS IT MONDAY ALREADY?!?!? I took the most perfect Sunday afternoon nap yesterday for 2 hours and it came back to laugh in my face at 1am this morning when I couldn't fall asleep.

 

My weekend was pretty great. Work Christmas party Friday night, walked in a parade Saturday night then yesterday was a huge celebration with my re-baptism. It was a low-key but filled with friends and family. It's so funny how I have become such a homebody these days. This time last year you couldn't keep me at home on the weekends, I was a wild woman still trying to find my happy. I know I am getting older (and maybe lame) because I actually look forward to going home and cuddling up with Tilly to watch How I Met Your Mother reruns. Maybe it's because it has rained for a week straight. Whatever the reason, I am definitely not mad about it.

Thank you all for your sweet comments about my baptism from Friday! It means so much to me to have your support. Y'all are the best! But surely you know that by now, since I cannot stop saying it! :) Some of my closest friends and family came to watch me too. It was such a time of happiness!

Oh yeah and I lost 5 lbs last week!!!! That's a total of 11 lbs down. It feels really good, but I still have a long way to go. Baby steps. I just want to whine sometimes and say that weight loss is tough, but I won't today. I'll just take my 11 lbs and smile!

You can find me on Instagram {nikkib918} to see my pictures from the weekend! I'm off to a meeting. Thankful for a 4 day workweek!!

 

 

 

A Time To Be Thankful

The best way to start your week is to count your blessings! So in honor of Veterans Day today, I want to take a moment just to be truly thankful. We are so blessed to be Americans. Blessed to live in a land of freedom, built by amazingly unselfish people who were willing to sacrifice their time and some even their lives to make that possible for us. Freedom isn't free and I am forever grateful to those who pay that price.

 

Other things I am thankful for today:

• I lost 3lbs last week! And my dad talked me into going to the gym last night for the first time in a while...at least a month. It felt good! It's always easier when you have a buddy too. I can't wait to have my hot body back!!

• Friends who are nerdy like me and will text with me throughout the Killing Kennedy movie (ahhem...Christa, I know you're reading this)
• Blind dates that terrify me but end up introducing me to someone I would never have picked for myself - in a good way
• Sushi dates with my best friend

• Oceans by Hillsong United - I am obsessed with this song (lyrics above). It's so powerful. I get teary every time I hear it. I know the video is a little long, but I dare you to listen to it and not be moved by it.

How's that for a Motivational Monday???

Getting My Groove Back

How many times have you heard me say "I'm sick of being chubby" "I'm getting back on the work out train" "I'm going to meet my goals"?? Probably 10 million. That's also the number of times I have failed to follow through and stay on track.

 

The struggle is REAL y'all. I was not born with a naturally thin body. I've never had skinny legs, which I have talked about before, and it really bothers me. I had lost some weight back in 2011, and was pretty much at my ideal size and happy. Then my breakup happened. I lost a ton of weight initially and I was skinny! But then it came back (and then some) after maaaaaany months of late nights of drinking away my feelings. And now my body feels like a stranger to me. It's not cute, it doesn't make me happy and it's embarrassing - but I have no one to blame but myself and I take that responsibility.

 

 

But this morning, I was in the gym by 5:15am LIKE A BOSS! My girl Manda always helps keep me motivated & we checked on each other this morning to make sure we followed through. In the back of my head I just kept thinking about Jordan & Nikki and wanting them to be proud of me for trying to get back in the 5am club, for real this time. And it feels damn good!! I think I'm back on track finally, and I need this to stick. I'm ready to be proud of myself again!

 

I know it can be annoying when someone talks all the time about their workouts, but I need the accountability. So when you see my post, my IG pic, or tweet - give me an atta girl instead of rolling your eyes. And I will do the same for you! There is absolute strength in supporting each other.

 

This morning

My simple goals:

1. Look good naked - I'm single, it's important. For me, not him.

2. Keep up with the 5am club

3. Be happy with my progress

4. Make 4 miles my short run

 

 

New Running Playlist

I am so excited to share this new playlist with y'all!! Not all of the songs are brand new, but you better believe they helped me turn out 5.5 mother f-ing miles last night! I'm not even sure the last time I ran 5 miles; it's been a real hot minute. I know that's no where near the ultimate goal of 13.1, but I was happy as a lark about it! I have until next March to keep training for this half marathon...and get back to my version of skinny again. And I'm just crazy enough to do it!

 

Forewarning: I am a freak. For some reason, I can keep a consistent running pace much better when I am listening to filthy rap music. Maybe sexually charged lyrics make me think about being naked...and looking good naked...so I am more determined on my runs? I don't know, but whatever the reason it works for me! NO judgement!

 

Oldies, but goodies:

1. No Hands - Waka Flocka

2. Hallie Berry - Hurricane Chris

3. Photoshoot - Gucci Mane

4. Dance A$$ - Big Sean

5. Fergalicious - Fergie

6. What's Your Fantasy Remix - Ludacris

7. Wired to the T - Dorrough

8. Solider - Destiny's Child

9. A Milli - Weezy

10.  Lose My Mind - Young Jeezy

11. Rock Yo Hips - Crime Mob

12. On to the Next One - Jay-Z

13. anything  from All Day - Girl Talk

14. Gold Digger - Kanye West
15. Bring It Back - Lil Wayne

 

New additions: Big Thanks to my little ghetto DJ Erica for helping me!

1. Make it Nasty - Tyga

2. Do Your Dance - Tyga

3. Amen - Meek Mill

4. Wild for the Night - A$AP Rocky

5. F*cking Problems - A$AP Rocky

6. RayBans - B.o.B.

7. Making Love to the Money - Gucci Mane

8. Molly - Tyga

9. Booty Wurk - T-Pain

10. Ayyy Ladies - Travis Porter

11. Same Damn Time Remix - Future

12. 50K Remix - Waka Flocka ft. TI

13. I Don't Really Care - Waka Flocka ft. Trey Songz

14. We Still in This - B.o.B ft. Juicy J

15. Pop That - French Montana

Whenever I feel like my legs are going to give out on me, I rely a lot on my playlist to get me through my run. Like last night mile 3 was ROUGH, I was tired and my mind wanted to stop and walk home. But then Booty Wurk by T-Pain came on my headphones and I was really able to power through and focus more on the song (and my booty) than my body's weakness. I am not a very long distance runner, or even a fast one, but just like with anything it really is a mind over matter deal.

 

 

 I am obsessed with music, so I am always finding new songs to add. I'll try to keep updating you on my playlist each month! Happy Running! And don't forget to stretch! XOXO

Curing #NOtivation: Looking Good = Feeling Good

<div align="center"><a href="http://www.thepinkgrowl.blogspot.com/" title="Mal Smiles"><img src="http://i1280.photobucket.com/albums/a500/MalloryCollinsWhitt/Notivation20x200_zps2f02ec49.png" alt="Mal Smiles" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

 

First order of business, we have three lucky winners for the Kickboxing DVD's giveaway. Check out Hallie's blog to see if you are one of them & claim your prize!

Today I want to talk about cute gym clothes, because let's face it we all feel better in cute clothes. I am a tiny obsession with gym clothes. Black workout capris? I probably own 10 pair. No joke. I love them! Sports bras? I just rearranged my bras the other day and counted, I have 18. I have 7 pairs of tennis shoes - but in my defense here I only wear 3 of them to the gym.

 

Target is one of my fav places to find cute, yet still very affordable clothes, with lots of color options. The Marshall's close to my house is AMAZING for this too. So many different color & style choices in the activewear.

Plus, all these cute custom workout tops now? I want one! Nutrition Snob on etsy has some of my favs!

Point being, I think it's true in life - even in the gym - that when you look cute, you feel better about yourself!

 

#Notivation Link Up: Feel free to link up ANY health or fitness posts! We want to create collection to inspire each other and cure #NOtivation. Hallie, Mallory, and I have a few fun things planned for future weeks and we hope you will link up every Tuesday.

 



Curing NOtivation: Kickboxing & GIVEAWAY!

<div align="center"><a href="http://www.thepinkgrowl.blogspot.com/" title="Mal Smiles"><img src="http://i1280.photobucket.com/albums/a500/MalloryCollinsWhitt/Notivation20x200_zps2f02ec49.png" alt="Mal Smiles" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

 

You know those LONG days when the last time you think you have time for is a hard workout? Well we have a solution for you then! Mal, Hallie & I were approached by GI Jayne Fitness to review their 30 minute kickboxing video. Personally, I have wanted to try kickboxing forever so I was super excited!

 

Things I loved about it:

- 30 minutes and done - actually 25 minutes

- Beginner level

- The class on the DVD is full of different sized people, not just skinny girls

 

I can't complain about burning 250 cals in 25 minutes. That's an easy workout! It's perfect for a way to still get a workout in on a recovery day or a day when you just can't drag yourself to the gym.

 

SOOOOO....3 of you lucky #NOtivation believers will get the chance to win a copy of the DVD too!! Winners will be announced next Tuesday!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

And don't forget to link up your #NOtivation tips every Tuesday with us! We call all help inspire each other one tip at a time!

Weekend Update - Lessons Learned

First weekend of summer is officially over. I spent most of mine laying out in the sun at my neighbor's pool, reading a new book and getting attacked my mosquitos. I had forgotten since last summer how much they love my sweetness. As a rude reminder, I now have 2304973487 bites. I look like I'm 12 years old.

 

Lessons Learned This Weekend - besides buy bug spray -

 

1. Family + Mexican = amazing Friday night. I am obsessed with Mexican food and margaritas right now. Nothing is better for unwinding on a Friday night with my cutie little cousin.

2. Love conquers all. My dating life is strange right now, inconsistent is probably the best word. But I am content. I have enough love in my life to get me through. "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." 1 Corinthians 13:13

3. Lazy Sundays are the best. Especially with my favorite fur baby.



4. Time to get serious about training for this half marathon. 5AM gym sessions began again today. I feel better about myself when I'm working out period.

Am I the only girl you know who can throw together a post including a bible verse AND the F-word? Yeah probably...sorry about that....

 

Happy Monday!