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Friday, October 21, 2016

Cameron Bumpdate: 34 weeks!

How far along: 34 weeks - 6 weeks left to go! Found out yesterday they are not moving my due date up, even though Cameron has been measuring consistently ahead. We are going to let him come when he's ready!

Baby is the size of a: GIANT BABY! Cameron is roughly 5 lbs 14 oz currently, according to my last ultrasound yesterday. That size makes me feel like we won't make it all the way until his due date... but what do I know!!!

Sleep: I'm still sleeping between 7-8 hours a night, just not feeling well rested most of the time. If I'm being completely honest, my mind wonders more than I should allow it to when I'm trying to fall back asleep after I get up to use the bathroom in the middle of the night.

Total Weight Gain: 24 lbs
Stretch Marks:  None yet.

Innie or Outie:  Innie for life!!!

Symptoms:  I get out of breath so easily. My lips and face are very dry too. Other than normal little aches and pains by the end of the day, I'm not struggling too much. Some days feel hard and I feel like I've gained 50 lbs and want to cry over everything, but there are really good normal days too. Such is life in the emotional roller coaster of the 3rd trimester! :)
Movement: He is finally head down! His feet are still facing the left side of my ribs and I still get kicked QUITE A BIT right there! He was moving all around showing off during our last ultrasound yesterday. Movement = healthy baby so I am happy with that! I know I will miss this feeling!

Miss anything?:  My normal hormone levels. I've been all kinds of emotional the past couple of weeks. I hate crying over the smallest things, then feeling silly after.
Maternity Clothes: Full force maternity clothes. Finally found a pair of jeans. No longer wearing pants with buttons.
Go-to eats: Not really having any cravings right now. Eating full meals makes me uncomfortable because there's no room for food in my belly. I do still have a sweet tooth though. I'll be surprised if I make it out of this pregnancy without any cavities.

Best moment of the week: Seeing my sweet baby boy's face again after 10 looooong weeks. He looks more like his daddy every time we get to see him. If you can look at this picture without obsessing over his lips and cheeks then you are far stronger than I am. I have probably obsessed over these pictures a million times in the past couple of days.

Gender: Confirmed by ultrasound for the final time that we are having a baby boy!

What I’m looking forward to: I'm getting a prenatal massage next week and I could not be more excited!!!!!!!! My back really feels the pressure of my large baby and this extra weight by the end of the day so I am looking forward to some much needed pampering here at the end.

Milestones: Weekly doctor appointments until he decides to make his appearance in this world!

You can follow me on Instagram for updates as we get closer to our due date! I doubt I'll be blogging after he gets here and while I'm on maternity leave. I hope once I'm back at work I'll try to post updates though.

Friday, October 7, 2016

Cameron Bumpdate: 32 Weeks!

How far along: 32 weeks - 8 weeks to go. SINGLE DIGIT WEEKS LEFT

Baby is the size of a: A naked tailed armadillo (Ovia Pregnancy App) or a head of lettuce (What to Expect app). Doctor told me yesterday they think he is roughly 4.5 lbs - give or take a couple ounces. Still measuring about a week and a half ahead.

Sleep: I'm pretty sleepy these days. It really doesn't take much to make me tired right now. The tossing and turning struggle has begun. The bigger my belly gets, the harder it is to turn over in the middle of the night and it becomes something that wakes me up. Still getting decent sleep though.

Total Weight Gain: 20-21 lbs. Definitely feels like more.

Practicing my tired mama look because most days in the evenings that's how I feel
Stretch Marks:  None yet.

Innie or Outie:  Innie for life!!!

Symptoms:  I.AM.SO.PREGNANT!!!!!! The past week has been more comfortable than the previous week. I think we went through a growth spurt around week 30-31 and mama could not get comfortable. Maybe I've just gotten used to that feeling now? But for whatever reason it's been better.
Movement: I'm starting to worry if my sweet boy will ever sleep once he arrives in this world. He seems to move pretty much constantly still - even though he's for sure running out of room and his movements are getting verrrrry uncomfortable for mommy. 

Miss anything?:  Plenty of things!!!!!! I would love a margarita right about now...
Maternity Clothes: Currently have two pairs of maternity pants in my work wardrobe - thank you Old Navy! The jeans I ordered didn't even come close to fitting right so I still need to invest in a pair of maternity jeans. (But I will say I ordered those jeans from Zulily and they have the BEST customer service!) Still rocking leggings, maxi skirts, dresses or yoga pants when at all possible! Comfort is everything!
Go-to eats: I had a random craving for relish this week. I saw a bottle of it and I had the urge to squirt all of it in my mouth. Just sounded so good at the time.
Best moment of the week: Always good to hear my baby's heartbeat and get props from the doctor on our health. He is healthy and growing like crazy, my BP is perfect still, and even though I'm achy I haven't had to deal with any swelling or real health issues. I might be struggling some days to feel great, but I am keeping my baby healthy and that's all that matters!

Gender: BOY!!! We will confirm that next week with one last ultrasound before he gets here.

What I’m looking forward to: The countdown is officially on until we get to see him, hold him and love on him. We are trying to enjoy these last few weeks as a family of 3, but we are all so excited to see our baby too!
Milestones: Tying my shoes is a milestone for me these days. I broke a sweat earlier this week trying to bend over and put my sandals on.


Friday, September 23, 2016

Cameron Bumpdate: 30 weeks!

How far along: 30 weeks - 10 (or maybe less) to go! I remember (before I ever dreamed of getting pregnant) hearing women say they were 30 weeks along and thinking "wow almost there!". I go back and forth between that feeling and like it's still pretty far away.

Baby is the size of a: Motorcycle helmet or platypus (according to my Ovia pregnancy app). Large cabbage based on normal fruit/veggie comparisons.

Sleep: Still getting enough most of the time. Some days I feel first trimester kind of tired though so that's draining.

Total Weight Gain: 17-17.5 lbs, Doctor was happy with that amount and the distribution of my weight at my 30 week appt. I wish it was a little less, but ehhhh I can't complain since I'm not working out right now.

Stretch Marks:  None yet.

Innie or Outie:  Innie for life!

Symptoms:  Rib jabs all day, every day. Wearing a real bra is getting verrrrry uncomfortable due to said rib jabs. General body aches/pains/discomfort that come with being this far along.

Movement: He's still a mover and a shaker. My doctor said this will probably change in a couple weeks once he turns out of breach position and won't have as much range of motion.

Miss anything?:  Breathing normally. I've struggled most of the 2nd trimester with my ability to breathe - of course it's been hotter than 3 hells this summer and humid as ever- which doesn't help. Now that he's even bigger and things are even more crowded, breathing regularly is getting harder. Lots of deep breaths!
Maternity Clothes: Broke down last week and ordered some maternity clothes from Old Navy and Zulily. My favorite thing is still my husband's tshirts.

Go-to eats: I've really been trying to drink a ton of water. I can feel the dehydration if I don't get enough. Ice cream is still a favorite too haha plus it helps with my heartburn!

Best moment of the week: Hearing his heartbeat at my 30 week doc visit. Always makes me so happy to hear it!

Gender: BOY!!!

What I’m looking forward to: Seeing my sweet boy's face in few weeks at my 34 week ultrasound. I haven't seen him in like a month and I miss his face!
Milestones: I'm going to be in a wedding next weekend - at 31 weeks pregnant - and I have mixed feelings about being a pregnant bridesmaid. It's one of my oldest friends though so I am so happy to be a part of her big day. Cameron's first wedding!

Monday, September 19, 2016

On Becoming a New Mommy...

I need to word vomit, and ramble and maybe cry? Not sure about the crying - some days yes, some days no. (HORMONES!) I just need a steady stream of consciousness with how I feel - good, bad and ugly 3rd trimester edition.

Pretty sure I also just a little bit need some reassurance and someone to tell me to CHILL!! Probably that more than anything else.

But first, here's a glance at how much my baby boy has grown in the past 10 weeks! Only 10 more to go!!! I cannot believe how fast the time has flown by.
holy baby bump!
Don't say I didn't warn you...

As a soon-to-be new mommy, I am reading what feels like hundreds of articles and tidbits of information daily. There is so much information related to pregnancy and children to digest, in a very small amount of time! It can certainly feel overwhelming. (Much like being pregnant itself can feel overwhelming at times.) Every single day of this journey, I have felt thankful for this gift of my child. That being said, as we get closer to the due date of my little man I do feel anxious. The fear of the unknown is very real.
When I was in my younger-mid 20's, I said I wasn't sure if I wanted to have kids. Maybe it was who I was dating at the time and their agenda that I had adopted, but regardless I often said out loud that I wasn't really sure about the whole having kids thing.
At the age of 31 and pregnant with my first child, I would give anything to go back to being in my 20's to get this party started. However, as my husband likes to remind me, if I had started then it wouldn't have been with him and this whole story would end up looking totally different. Good point! I have to remind myself (quite a bit some days) that everything is happening exactly the way that God intended for everything to happen. More specifically, that God has already written every single day of my baby boy's life and the best part about that is? He chose ME to be Cameron's mom. He knows I can do this and I'm the only person who has what it takes to be my child's mother.

It's hard for me to fathom that I was once the girl who said she didn't want kids. Or even the fact that I was lukewarm to the idea of it all. Oh how time can change us! These days I am more than mildly obsessed with this little boy growing in my belly. My every thought revolves around him, and my time is spent trying to savor each little kick as he navigates around inside my belly. I could literally sit for hours and watch/feel him move, or watch my husband and stepdaughter talk to him or feel him move in response to them. He just has no idea how loved he is already!!

Sure, a baby changes things. Actually, a baby changes absolutely everything. It's probably going to rock my world. I think no amount of preparation could ever get us ready for his arrival. No amount of me thinking, "HOLY $HIT CAN I REALLY DO THIS?" is going to make feel more ready.

One thought lingering around my mind these days is can I really mother without my mother? I know that I am not the first person in the world to experience the birth of their first child without their mother. But sometimes that is really heavy on my heart. We take each day without my mom and we navigate what the day brings us. The milestones are hard. Planning your wedding to a man your mother never met is hard. Revealing your pregnancy to your family and remembering how much my mom wanted to have grandkids is hard. I do know for a 100% a fact that if my mom was still here, she would be driving me absolutely crazy. (Sorry mom, but you know It's the truth!) Even though she was a flawed parent (aren't we all?), my mom had 4 kids and I know I would be able to count on her right now. To talk me through things, to ease my fears, to be another family member to deeply love my child.  I think a lot of it has to do with the feelings of overwhelming love that I'm feeling and will forever feel for Cameron, as my first born child. I was my mom's first born child and she always told me how special that was - that, and the fact that I was her only girl. I wish so badly I could just talk to her right now and unload all these feelings. I know she would have a way of putting me at ease.

People tell me it's "normal" to feel the things I feel. However "normal" it can be to feel the absolute most excited, yet completely terrified about something at the very same time...

I need to step back, take a DEEEEEP breath and focus on the things I can control. My attitude, my responses to others, my actions. I am in love with growing this baby inside of my body. It's truly mind blowing and the absolute biggest blessing in this life. I do not want to take a single day for granted that I get to carry this baby and the sheer fact I am growing him in my body. It's such a miracle! I am blessed with a healthy, happy pregnancy. Sure, there are days when I feel like screaming WTF at my body or feel overwhelmed, but that's life. I've remained healthy, and my baby is healthy and growing. I can't even put into words how thankful I am for my husband. I know I've probably taken him for granted a lot lately, but he's been wonderful. Bless his heart for having to deal with me!! I choose to remain grateful in the face of fear. I have so much to be thankful for, and that's where my focus needs to be. I am guilty of letting negativity creep into my mind and control my thoughts.

Hopefully when Satan decides to quit breathing his hot summer air around me, I'll feel much better. Being 7 1/2 months pregnant in the summer is for the birds!!!!!!!! HA! I need to look into yoga or meditation. As thankful as I am for carrying this child, he sure does love to hang out right under my ribs and it hurts like crazy! Love you Cameron, but I need you to reposition yourself.

I told y'all - I'm crazy right now!!