Tis the Season for Making Broken Things Beautiful

Where do I even begin with this post??? Well first of all, thank you all for your sweet comments on my last post before Thanksgiving. I have to admit that it ended up being a pretty good Thanksgiving with my mom's side of the family. We were all a little worried about how it might be, but in the end, we were able to celebrate each other and our blessings. The only tears shed were during the prayer before we ate when we thanked God for sending us mom to have in the first place.

So now on to Christmas! I have realized something about myself this year... I am embarrassed to say it, but I am a Christmas pessimist. I complain about the season, complain about my family situation and find myself saying "I hate Christmas!" frequently. As much as I try to be a positive person in general, Christmas gets the best of me. BUT WHY? Christmas is NOT supposed to be about me. But I am quite ashamed to admit that I am constantly trying to make it center around me.

I don't have enough money for all the gifts I want to buy

I don't have normal family relationships

I don't have time for 12 Christmas stops

I don't get enough time off work around the holidays

Selfish. Selfish. Selfish.

Christmas tends to make me feel broken. Beat down. Financially broke. Kinda ungrateful. It's ugly. I have come to expect the worst, and that's not really who I want to be. But this year, just three days before Christmas I have  renewed sense of HOPE. Hope in the fact that God is still working all around me - even on the hard days when I feel very far from him. Hope that my family can be restored. Hope that Christmas can still stand for exactly what it should always stand for - even though I try to manipulate the meaning and make it about me. Hope in GRACE!

So this morning, as my attitude was slowing shifting from Scrooge to Buddy the Elf, I had an epiphany of sorts. This IS what the Advent season is about. It's what it's ALL about! Christmas is about celebrating the ultimate gift of the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ and recognizing that He came to rescue us from this broken world. I read something a couple weeks ago over at (in)courage and it's really stuck with me. I've gone back to re-read it several times, but it wasn't until today that it truly clicked.

Christmas is the ultimate story of hope, of grace, of restoration. Isn't that just the best reminder??

My life can feel messy. When the mess feels overwhelming and heavy (which can be more times than I'd care to admit), I tend to completely forget the redemption of restoration. I tend to focus only what is weighing me down, and then I'm unable to feel God around me. Things have changed drastically for me since last Christmas. I went back to reread my Christmas post from 2014 and I laughed a little at how much things have changed. Somehow I always forget how vastly things can change just within a year's time!!

I think slowly, but surely, I am learning these lessons. But I also know eventually that even if this time of year is always a little hard on the heart for me, God's hope of restoration is always always always here. And for that, I am thankful!

Oh yeah - and in case you missed it - this Christmas I am going to be showing off some new bling!!!!! I got engaged on 12/12!! Even though it's been 10 days already, I still can't shake the excitement. I cannot wait to marry this man. I hope he knows how much I love him. Talk about the ultimate feeling of coming full circle with my journey. I can't wait to see what God has planned for us (& hopefully our family) this coming year!!

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!! I hope you can take a moment to breathe in your blessings and recognize that is always something to be thankful for! I know I will be forcing myself to do that over the next week. XOXO

Weekend Shenannies - or Lack There Of...

oh hey Monday, it's you again... I usually don't dread Mondays so much, but I just REALLY do not feel like being at work today. I can sum up my weekend pretty quick for you... Hangover City! Whew, apparently I had a little bit too much fun Friday night at Chris Tucker and I was down for the count Saturday. Literally all day just worthless. Is this where I say "I'm too old for this??"  I couldn't even rally and make it out for girl's night Saturday. Sunday, I actually drug myself to the gym before church but then was pretty lazy after. It's the weather, I swear. SO SICK OF THE RAIN!!!

me and my pals and OH, HEEEEY CHRIS TUCKER! Worst pic of me ever BTW....

Everybody likes a picture of freshly clean Tilly right?!?

Watched the Nine for IX documentary about Pat Summitt for the 3rd time yesterday....cried like a baby AGAIN. I feel thankful to have grown up in Knoxville during Pat Summitt's era. I'm blessed to have met her a couple times and she is one truly amazing woman.

 

Mandatory Christmas Recap Post

Since I skipped this yesterday, here is my mandatory Christmas recap post for you. Via Instagram, of course! You can find me on Instagram here {nikkib918}.

 

Christmas Eve was wonderful! I spent my day shopping around town getting last minute gifts - Target, Marshall's... the Liquor Store... and didn't really have to suffer through crowds. I love shopping for others. Santa was on a budget this year though so that tends to put a damper on things. Family time on Christmas Eve was fabulous...wine helped. Christmas Day kinda got the best of me, but in my defense I had major PMS and the timing was just awful with my first single girl holiday.

 

Even though I was a little down, I still know that I have many blessings to be thankful for this holiday season. I am thankful for my family, my mom's good spirits despite her health concerns, for good food because I sure did eat enough of it. {Hello 5 lbs back on my hips!} But honestly, I'm glad it's over. I'm very much looking forward to moving on into the new year!

 

Thankful for BFFs this year!

The only boy who will ever fully have my heart, my bro!

Tilly's Christmas PJs

My darlin little cousin

FAMILY!



Books I got from my Gran Gran - self help at it's finest and I can't wait to dig in!

 

Engagement Pictures - Sneaky Peeky

To all my friends who are braving this crazy Sandy storm - you are in my thoughts & prayers! Stay safe! (If you can even read this because you might be without power).

 

I have a special little treat for you today! (Really it's a special treat for me, but hopefully you will enjoy it too.) If you have been following The Pink Growl for any length of time now you know that almost 9 weeks ago we had our engagement pictures taken. I have been waiting...not so patiently...to see these babies. I had to beg and plead with Skye just to have them done. I was probably more excited about these pictures than just about any other detail in wedding planning, thus far. You can see our three original sneak peek photos here. Of those three: I loved one, liked one and thought I looked fat in one. My photographer posted a Sneak Peek engagement album of 20 pictures on Facebook last night, and I'm waiting to get the actual disk from her with 100 pictures. I am on the fence with some of them that she posted, so I'm hoping there are more on the disk that I love. I want to be blown away by them and I want them to bring tears to my eyes. The pictures are the most important thing to me because that's basically all we will have to look back on.

 

Here's your sneaky peeky of my favs! I will show you more when I get the disc in the mail. What do you think?? Be honest!

 

{All images are courtesy of Blush Creative Photography}

 

 

Weekend Update

Let's pretend like it's not Monday after all. Can we do that? I had such a great weekend! Lots of friend time, fun time and Skye time. If you already follow me on Instagram then you have seen some of the shenanigans. If you don't already follow me - then go find me now! {username: nikkib918}.

I saw Pitch Perfect Friday night. HI-LAR-IOUS! I laughed until I had tears. I highly recommend seeing it if you need a good laugh. It reminded me of my old showchoir days in high school.

 

I think I'm back on my grind with working out, eating semi-healthy and running. The Color Me Rad 5k was AWESOME! It was the most fun I've had ever performing exercise. I want to do it every weekend. I'm about to start a mile a day challenge for at least 30 days. I have some friends doing this right now and they are loving it. It challenges you to run at least 1 mile every single day. It's a great way to push yourself to do something physical each day.

 

After I washed away all my colorfulness, we went to Skye's squad's Halloween party Saturday night. We ended up not wearing costumes - boring, I know. But only a few people there actually had on costumes so I'm glad we didn't spend the money to go all out. I spent most of the day yesterday nursing a terrible hangover. Apparently I'm too old to get down like I used to.

 

Oh and remember months ago when I told you I lost a diamond from my favorite diamond hoop earrings? Well I got that fixed finally! I was so excited to get them back!

 

BEFORE - with my RAD tat

AFTER - Team Got the Runs

Love this shot - it was with an actual camera instead of our phones and the colors are so vivid.

Color Me Rad 5k - The day in a nutshell

Skye and I at his squad's Halloween party

Gah lee my lover is handsome!

You Don't Know Jacques - wonderfully sweet birthday present from my friend Messy.Dirty.Hair! I think it's my new fav color!

 And for all my Real Housewives of New Jersey fans out there - did you watch the reunion part 2 last night??? OMG! It's embarrassing how excited I get from the drama! I can't wait until the guys come in next week. Looks like Joe Gorga gets pretty heated.

 

Happy Monday loves!! Make it a great day!

Oh How Pinteresting: Wedding Wednesday Edition

 

Back to wedding talk today via Pinterest with a little surprise of my own at the bottom of this post. My wedding is 206 days away. The time is absolutely flying by. Major things that still need to be accomplished are finalizing a caterer and a DJ. I honestly never knew that DJs were so freaking expensive! It's insane! If you know any good DJs in the Knoxville/East Tennessee area then holla at your girl.

 

Here are some of my ideas for my perfectly purple lake wedding!

LOVE the ombre carnations!
Source: Jada hill via http://ruffledblog.com/purple-ombre-wedding-ideas/

You know I hate regular veils so I need other options.
Souce: Whitney Colleen via http://www.loveandlavender.com/2011/08/kristi-bonnici-headpiece-giveaway/

Reppin UT!
Source: Caroline Carlton via http://www.gartersandsuch.com/University-of-Tennessee-wedding-garter-p/tenngarter.htm

Cute idea to have a picture and About the Bridesmaids section at the reception
Source: Ashley Avila via http://the6chicks.com/2010/06/15/bridesmaid-love/

Gorgeous eye makeup for brown eyes
Source: Lauren Musec via http://www.iknowhair.com/popular-hairstyles-from-pinterest/

Perfect dock shot, I hope we get one like this!
Source: Brianna Blanchard via http://shelivedbythesea.tumblr.com/page/98

I love the simple flowers, with the bottles and maybe baby's breath.
Source: Ashley DeJesus via http://52flea.blogspot.com/2011/04/royal-color.html

Monogram
Source: Pamela Quijano via http://mypearlescake.com/gallery.php?recordsperpage=12&startrow=156&pagenum=

 And now for my little surprise for you...OUR SAVE THE DATE!

Source: Blush Creative Photography 2012

We ordered them last week so they should be in soon. I choose this picture because the water in the background and I wanted a really fun one on the Save the Date. Our photographer actually had me stand in front of Skye, with his arms around my shoulders and he would pull back towards him. It felt like I was going to fall, but I think it turned out pretty cute. I can't wait to marry this man! You like??

Wedding Wednesday

And here we are at my 2nd Wedding Wednesday! I am beyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyond f@#&*+$king excited to present to you a little sneaky peaky at our engagement pictures! After this post, you have my solemn promise not to mention these engagement pictures again until I get them all back in about 4 weeks. Then I will probably continue to blab about them and show them to you....I know I'm totally that girl and I can't help myself.

 

All pictures are courtesy of my wonderful photographer Stephanie from Blush Creative Photography {Knoxville, TN}. She also travels around if you are looking for someone for your special occasion. Here's her FB page.

If I had to pick a least favorite, it would be #3. Just because I think our faces look awkward maybe? And I think my legs look chubby in #3 - just sayin. I love them all though! I CANNOT wait to see the rest in a few weeks, plus she's also designing our custom save the date design!

So, what do ya think?? Worth the wait???