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Thursday, November 8, 2012

MIA


 
Hi loves - I know I have been MIA for over a week now, so I just wanted to pop in and give you a bit of an explanation for my absence. There's no easy way to sugar coat it so I'm just going to spill it. Skye and I are breaking up. This decision was made on Sunday - the night I got home from Iowa- so needless to say my world has been quite the confusing place lately. It's not his fault at all, in fact it's completely mine. I'm the one to blame and my actions have caused this backlash. It's his decision to split, but it's based on me. He really has done no wrong. We are both heartbroken and trying to find ways to deal with this absolute tragedy. I plan on taking a bit of an extended absence from social media - blogging, Instagram, Facebook, maybe even Twitter until all this calms down a little bit. It's just too hard to keep up with right now when my mind is in an absolute fog.

 
I've been telling myself all the bullshit cliche things: It will get easier with time. Things will work out in the end. If it's meant to be then we will end up back together. Pinterest has offered me some helpful mantras too. But nothing can fully soothe my aching heart right now. Even though I love my readers and I truly appreciate your support - I can't bear to read your comments and feel you feeling sorry for me so I'm going turn comments off on this post. Don't feel sorry for me. Yes I'm going through a hard time, we all go through hard times. And we all come out stronger because of them. Breakups suck. Losing my absolute best friend and the person I thought I was going to marry in 5 months absolutely sucks. I pray for strength, guidance, peace - I'm just praying alot.
 
The good news is Skye and I are being very civil to make sure this will not turn into a terrible ugly breakup. My family & friends have been so supportive and amazing, checking on me each day to make sure I'm still getting up and going. Work has been a true blessing because it keeps my mind busy during the days. He moved out yesterday so I'm absolutely dreading this weekend alone. But the first weekend will be the hardest and hopefully they will get easier from there. I am throwing myself into cleaning my house from top to bottom and reorganizing everything. I am more determined than ever now to FINALLY go through with my damn master bathroom redesign. I need a change, change is good. And of course I have my precious pups to keep me sane.
 
I don't know where we go from here. I'm sure I will get back into blogging, just not sure when. I miss reading about your lives, but I just need some time to get my life back on track. Thank you to those of you who have already reached out to me asking me where I've been. I thank God for my blog friends who have been just as supportive as my real life friends!