Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Making it Work

I read an interesting article today that triggered some thoughts about how people make it work in their relationships...

Here is a link to the Yahoo! article:
lessons learned from 18 years of marriage

I am a stubborn person and I'm a grudge holder. Both of these qualities are just part of who I am, however annoying that may be. I have focused on the grudge thing and tried to get better, but obviously it's just not that easy for me to "let it go". It's usually something that bites me in relationships too. My wonderful boyfriend is the type who can fight one minute and be fine and happy the next minute. I want to stay mad all night. I know that's awful, and it's hard to admit, but it's very true. Not to defend myself in the least, but I am very much a Type-A personality when it comes to control in a relationship. If someone causes me to feel a loss of control, I want them to know it and remember it - hence, the grudge holding to prove a point (I guess?). Anyhow, it sounds like I am creating a long list of why in fact I am not married. I am also an eye roller. I noticed in the above article it suggests not to roll your eyes or make sarcastic comments...guilty and guilty.

Skye and I have almost been together for 7 years, come this December. 7 years is not a short amount of time so we must be doing SOMETHING right to have made it this far, right? I am working on coming up with a list of things that have proved to work for us over our relationship. I am finding that my list includes things that Skye often does, but I need to work on. Sounds like I need a tutorial in executing things that can "make it work".

This is what I have so far:
1. Pick your battles
2. No namecalling
3. Don't bring up past battles
4. Make time for each other

For that maybe one person who is reading this blog, what do you do to make it work with your significant other?

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